What is happiness?
According to Wikipedia: The term happiness is used in the context of mental or emotional states, including positive or pleasant emotions ranging from contentment to intense joy. It is also used in the context of life satisfaction, subjective well-being, flourishing, and well-being.
Happiness is a state of personal expansion as well. When we feel happy, we feel on top of the world and that nothing can bring us down. When we feel happy, we feel ready to take on new challenges or scale up our skills, knowledge, relationships, and everything that is important to us.
Why do we want to be happy?
Everything we do, we do it in order to feel better. Even when we hurt ourselves, it means that there is a pain greater than the pain we will experience. Especially if we self-harm. If we self-harm, it means that the mental pain, we are experiencing, is far greater than the physical pain. We find relief in the physical pain. However extreme this example is, I know a lot of those who self-harm will agree with me.
We always seek to reach a state of greater happiness or relief from our pain. But let’s talk about the different types of happiness:
- Joy: A often relatively brief feeling that is felt in the present moment. We experience joy when we do something we like, when we receive something we have been wanting, or when we have been surprised pleasantly
- Excitement: A happy feeling that involves looking forward to something with positive expectations. Have you ever been looking forward to wearing your favorite dress at a party? Have you ever been looking forward to that lovely holiday, you booked several months ago?
- Gratitude: A positive emotion that involves being thankful and appreciative. It is always good to express gratitude to those, who have done something nice for us or helped us in one way or another. Gratitude always invokes that nice warm feeling inside of us.
- Pride: A feeling of satisfaction in something that you have accomplished. Healthy pride is good, very good actually. Because in feeling proud we do not downplay our accomplishments nor do we need to seek someone else’s approval, which we might not ever receive. So be proud of what you have accomplished, regardless of how big or small it is. It is your accomplishment non the less!!!
- Optimism: This is a way of looking at life with a positive, upbeat outlook. Of course, not everything in life happens in the way we want it to. But even those experiences that cause us pain, aka negative blessings, bring us something beneficial. Having an optimistic outlook of life is more about instead of asking the question “Why me?” to ask the question “Why not?”, because when we are presented with obstacles we find new creative ways to overcome them.
- Contentment: This type of happiness involves a sense of satisfaction with our present circumstances. Although we may not have everything we want, we have got everything we need to survive. Being content doesn’t mean that we are complacent. Being content means that we acknowledge that what we need has been provided and we have to look at our resources when we seek growth and expansion, and how we can utilize, in the best possible way, these resources.
Key signs we are happy?
While perceptions of happiness may be different from one person to the next, there are some key signs that psychologists look for when measuring and assessing happiness.
Some key signs of happiness include:
- Feeling like you are living the life you wanted
- Feeling that the conditions of your life are good
- Feeling that you have accomplished (or will accomplish) what you want in life
- Feeling satisfied with your life
- Feeling positive more than negative
What should we aim for?
There are two key components of happiness:
- The balance of emotions: Everyone experiences both positive and negative emotions, feelings, and moods. Happiness is generally linked to experiencing more positive feelings than negative ones.
- Life satisfaction: This relates to how satisfied you feel with different areas of your life including your relationships, work, achievements, and other things that you consider important.
Is it possible to be happy all the time?
The honest answer is NO! It is impossible to feel happy all the time. The reason for that is our constant expansion and personal growth. Once we reach the end of one stage of expansion and growth we are ready for the next one. But that expansion and growth doesn’t always happen smoothly but sometimes there is emotional pain involved.
We do not grow while we are happy. Happiness might help us go through that challenging time, but according to my experience, we grow through feeling pain. Imagine you are sitting on your comfortable couch and you feel like it is hugging you, and you are so comfortable. I know it feels like we can do that forever but the truth is that if we are sitting in the same position, eventually we become uncomfortable and we need to move. On the other hand, after a period of time, that couch will wear out and it will start becoming more and more uncomfortable until we decide that it is time for a new one. It is the same with our life. After being in the same position at work or with the same earnings, we want more, we want better. And that creates the growth pain we eventually will experience.
So in conclusion, happiness is a mindset that allows us instead of seeing doom and gloom to see possibilities.
Or book your session with me
